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My first Lexus and the anger in the family - Am I alone?


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6 hours ago, Bob Karly said:

My father in law asked how many HP the car had. When I told 381 HP he just FREAKED OUT big, big time. Started saying that such a car is for dumb, idiot and irrational people.

I'd guess this isn't about the car. It could be about all sorts of things.

A lot of it may be about what the neighbours think (their neighbours not yours).

It could be about nationalities - their daughter married a non-German, who doesn't understand the need to support German industry. (If you're British that might excuse you to some extent.)

It could be about war-time legacy. Some older British people would never touch a Japanese car on principle. I don't know what Germans think about Japan.

It could be about the need to conform in small-town Germany.

It could be because it looks too extravagant and money should be spent carefully to protect the future of the grandchildren.

I'll be tuning in regularly to hear the next episodes!

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Bob,

I live in Holland and, also, own a 2007 LS460. 

As many people have said, if you'd bought a Merc, Audi or BMW, nothing would have been said. It's the same here in Holland...….nearly all big cars are German. I've owned an LS (400 or 460) since 1997 and I don't want anything else.

Enjoy your new car and smile smugly when you see the look on friends and acquaintances faces when they ride in the car.

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Listen to your wife, she loved the car that is all that matters!

Welcome to the forum by the way!

 

Before I bought L:exus I considered Jaguar XF and Merc E-class and my wife said you are not that old (I am 38 with 2 kids) to drive a Merc! this was it, I never even went for a Merc test drive! Lol!

No regrets with Lexus at all and I consider myself a BMW man!

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5 minutes ago, Vlady said:

Listen to your wife, she loved the car that is all that matters!

Welcome to the forum by the way!

 

Before I bought L:exus I considered Jaguar XF and Merc E-class and my wife said you are not that old (I am 38 with 2 kids) to drive a Merc! this was it, I never even went for a Merc test drive! Lol!

No regrets with Lexus at all and I consider myself a BMW man!

Look how funny. We have the same age and aldo 2 kids. This can only be a sign! Getting my Lexus asap! 😂

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I feel sorry for your parents in-law as they are missing out on so many things if they let what "other people" think rule their decisions. My experience of Germans is that some can be quite willing to try something new, but many of them live in a fantasy world of "ordnung" and are terrified of anything that stands out. If you want to fit in then the Lexus is not for you. If you want to be your own man, then the Lexus is for you. :-) 
My father-in-law loved the Honda Legend I had when he was still alive as at 6'3" and 90 years old he could get in and out of it quite easily.
He would have loved the LS too.

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Bob, I would have been as shocked as you if I got that reaction and can understand why you feel stunned.

My family reacted quite differently when I got my Lexus, they were pleased.

I think the replies have covered all the angles and that you should be proud in your purchase. 

It's not your fault if they perceive you as the black sheep, instead perhaps they should review how odd they are reacting.

While they sort themselves out, enjoy your Lexus.

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I never ever thought of Lexus until my W140 was at the stage of “Rust In Peace” and then seeing a twenty something year old Lexus with no rust I took a chance on the LS400.

I loved the W140 which really was a Gangsters / Pimps  Car over here in the UK,  although the Lexus in America was (Sopranos) the Car of choice perhaps?

Only thing I miss about the W140 early (96) model was the soft closing doors and the wider body and seats.  Daresay in the LS430 all these points are answered?

OK my Barge was older and I didn’t even go and see it but just bought it and had it trailered to me. Some expense to get it up to standard but now a most reliable car for my 600 mile drive to France, and back every so often.

Only reason I might upgrade one day is because you can get bored with Cars after a while. The Celsior has caught my eye.

Had the W140 six years on LPG as much more thirsty than the V8 Lexus.  Had a W126 SEL and before that a W126 SEC  and they were fine cars.  After ’98 Mercs reliability or costs to replace parts etc, was a downside I didn’t want to experience. BMW never had the inclination to drive, and maybe I missed something? Being older makes you look for comfort first.

Good luck with your purchase and if the in-laws ever go out in your Lexus I suspect their prejudice will evaporate.  

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Most unlike the Germans to impose their views on someone else. Their response sounds disproportionate, intrusive and rude (again, hard to believe). On the one hand, I might tell them that it's my money, hard earned and that it's f**k all to do with them. I might add that not in the too distant past, millions of men in Britain and elsewhere fought and died fighting fascism and won the right to have freedom of choice etc that we enjoy today (including their freedom to criticise, I suppose). On the other hand, I might explain that 70km is a significant commute and demands a level of refinement and comfort that only a large car can provide, and none can match the LS. I might add that reliability is of the utmost importance and that the Lexus is miles in front of the over priced pieces of s**t produced in Germany. I might also mention that the LS is one of the most aerodynamically efficient cars on the planet and is probably surprisingly economical over long distances.

As for what a car says about you, who gives a crap? People criticise anyone over 45 for having an MX 5, which is bull****, they get the same level of fun out of them as anyone else.. Buy what suits you, life is too short.

Either way, I would not stand for that crap and would politely put them in their place one way or another, or your life will be pretty miserable in the future. I can't think of a single relative or friend who would react like that.

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I meant to add that, in my humble opinion, buying a Lexus at any level is an intelligent and discerning choice. Lexus themselves showed a level of intelligence when they ditched diesel engines before their inherent problems and public perception changed for the worse. Perhaps your in laws are not at the same intellectual level as you and simply can't see the up side of owning such a car. 

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First and foremost I assume you live with these people? If not why do you care? Letting your in laws dictate what you should or should not do first mistake.. ignore and do what you like seriously life is too short to have your gonads squeezed by your in laws. 

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5 hours ago, harrylime said:

Most unlike the Germans to impose their views on someone else. Their response sounds disproportionate, intrusive and rude (again, hard to believe). On the one hand, I might tell them that it's my money, hard earned and that it's f**k all to do with them. I might add that not in the too distant past, millions of men in Britain and elsewhere fought and died fighting fascism and won the right to have freedom of choice etc that we enjoy today (including their freedom to criticise, I suppose). On the other hand, I might explain that 70km is a significant commute and demands a level of refinement and comfort that only a large car can provide, and none can match the LS. I might add that reliability is of the utmost importance and that the Lexus is miles in front of the over priced pieces of s**t produced in Germany. I might also mention that the LS is one of the most aerodynamically efficient cars on the planet and is probably surprisingly economical over long distances.

As for what a car says about you, who gives a crap? People criticise anyone over 45 for having an MX 5, which is bull****, they get the same level of fun out of them as anyone else.. Buy what suits you, life is too short.

Either way, I would not stand for that crap and would politely put them in their place one way or another, or your life will be pretty miserable in the future. I can't think of a single relative or friend who would react like that.

Thanks for the nice words, mate. I also do believe that 70 Km a day is a significant commute. They said is a short one, but hey, who is going to seat with the a** in the driver seat is me. So, let me give it a nice treatment! A drove the LS for about 30 minute and can't wait to drive it again. I will try to get it next week. 🙂

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5 hours ago, harrylime said:

I meant to add that, in my humble opinion, buying a Lexus at any level is an intelligent and discerning choice. Lexus themselves showed a level of intelligence when they ditched diesel engines before their inherent problems and public perception changed for the worse. Perhaps your in laws are not at the same intellectual level as you and simply can't see the up side of owning such a car. 

Exactly. I educated myself a lot in the last three months. Saw a lot of video, read a lot of articles and this forum. A argument "this car is for dumb, stupid and irresponsible people" will not erase the fact that Lexus kicks *****. Hey, I love to drive. Always did. Fought my battles to get a good qualification, career, job and salary. Why not to give myself a nice gift with my OWN money? 

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4 hours ago, jdanielca said:

First and foremost I assume you live with these people? If not why do you care? Letting your in laws dictate what you should or should not do first mistake.. ignore and do what you like seriously life is too short to have your gonads squeezed by your in laws. 

I don't live with them. Thank God. Live is indeed too short to ignore my own desires. I just want see their faces during their first ride with me. Well, if they are invited after all. 😉😎

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Update

My wife was p**** off to hear the whole soupd opera and her parents freak out. Of course, as a good German, she is always thibking about the 460's fuel consumption, but she admitted that the car is very confortable as f***. Just because I love her I went to a Toyota today to test a Avensis Station Wagon. Drove 40 minutes with the car. No. Just no. Not after driving the 460. Funny thing: they have the exact same price. Of course the 460's running cost is higher. Around 40% but the pleasure of driving one is 200% higher.

Funny thing is that my mother in-law heard today that I would test a Toyota and said "Hey Bob, of course you can buy you a Lexus. Sorry for the mess the other day. My husband was very rude and overreacted when he heard your decision. He is nuts sometimes. Don't make any thoughts. Buy what you think is the best for you." Well, I think somebody has googled "LS 460 overview" and watched some YouTube Videos. 😂😂 

Will most probably get the 460 next week!

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I'm not averse to driving ordinary cars, in addition to my old LS 400 my daily workhorse is a Skoda Octavia 1.9, it is a fine car for what it is. However, I once test drove a Toyota Avensis estate and thought it was a hateful thing. It made sense in many ways including size, reliability etc. but it was so bland and horrible to drive it was morale sapping

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On 2/19/2019 at 9:36 AM, Bob Karly said:

Dear Lexus Lovers,

after months and months researching to by my first Lexus, I found a beautiful and full option Lexus 460 from 2007. I made the test drive yesterday and I have to say: what a machine. The best car I ever drove. No comparison with some Audis, BMWs and Mercedes I had in my hands. I was very convinced to buy it...until I told my mother and father in law.

 

My father in law asked how many HP the car had. When I told 381 HP he just FREAKED OUT big, big time. Started saying that such a car is for dumb, idiot and irrational people. He did not even bother to ask me to see the pictures and videos of the car. Not even bothered to hear why I would buy such a car after researching  every day in the last 3 months to find the best, most reliable and safe car for the budget I have. His "argument" is that buying such a car to commute 70 Km a day to work is ridiculous. I was shocked.

 

My mother in law was at first mad at him because the words he used against me but afterwards said that such a car does not fit to a well succeed young professional and young father (I am 38 and 2 small kids). That such car is for old guys with rolex. Then they said I was just waiting for: that in Germany (yes, we live in Germany although I am not german; they are) having such big cars is bad perceived by others. Like, it is car for guys from third world countries coming to Germany, for pimps, show-offs and so on. That in town people would find very strange and would make thoughts. What would my colleagues at work think  of me. When I asked then what car would "fit" to me, my father in law said it was not his task to tell that (even because he is ignorant in this topid)  and my mothe in law said that a BMW would be way better ignoring the fact that they are money pits.

 

I was shocked, big, big time and my day was destroyed. It felt like being bashed and considered a low life for choosing for my dream car. Important fact: my wife was totally against having a Lexus mainly because of the fuel consumption, but she was amazed after the test drive. Like, wow!

 

Sorry for writting such a long and personal case here, but I would really like to listen if you guys also had the same experience. If Lexus is really so bad seen in Europe/Germany and having one is related to bad things, like being a ignorant pimp.

 

I really don't bother what other thinks of me as long they don't pay my bills. Because I know people buy money pits like BMWs and Mercedes because of status and not because they are good. But boy, oh, boy I was shaked. 

 

Thanks guys

I'll tell you why so many people put down Lexus (especially the massive pricey ones)- jealousy. Because the LS is so understated but expensive to run it becomes a paradox- it is an example of inner satisfaction and contentment. Look at it this way, all the people out on the roads who drive expensive and ostentatious cars do it for a reason, they want to be noticed and they want people to covet them and quite frankly, if I had a life which was worth coveting and being jealous of then I wouldn't need to prove that. Who needs to prove what they know already? What's the aim? People in pricey to run gas guzzling cars like the LS which don't however stand out and look more plain compared to the competition display the fact that the owner has enough in the world that they are happy of themselves and feel awkward shoving it in people's faces. Perhaps it's just that your mom in law felt that a fortunate professional like yourself should be proud of his success and want to flaunt it and she is very proud of you? What your father IL said though (in my personal opinion, not trying to be offensive) is not very nice and factually wrong. Either way it's your choice and the Lexus beats all the competition. The 460 is one of my many dream cars lol and no one is shameful for wanting a car to their personal taste. Buy it and be happy, and safe!  Btw- many many years back when I was a kiddie and my mom was waiting to pick me up outside school in gold on beige 430 one of the other moms said she looked like a Russian spy so can't be all that bad 🤣 However all the LS drivers I see around UK are older people or enthusiasts, no pimps that I know of and that certainly isn't the rep they get here. In the States maybe? 

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12 hours ago, The Lexus Enthusiast said:

I'll tell you why so many people put down Lexus (especially the massive pricey ones)- jealousy. 

People put down other people's choices to help confirm they were right about their own choices. 

 

Quote

“In experiments at Baylor University where people were given Coke and Pepsi in unmarked cups and then hooked up to a brain scanner, the device clearly showed a certain number of them preferred Pepsi while tasting it. When those people were told they were drinking Pepsi, a fraction of them, the ones who had enjoyed Coke all their lives, did something unexpected. The scanner showed their brains scrambling the pleasure signals, dampening them. They then told the experimenter afterward they had preferred Coke in the taste tests.” 


 

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My in laws,  and some family  including  the wife hated me buying big cars , so I did , then I bought  a LS400, the wife loved it so we bought  another , you only live once  .enjoy you ride

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On 2/20/2019 at 9:40 PM, The Lexus Enthusiast said:

I'll tell you why so many people put down Lexus (especially the massive pricey ones)- jealousy. Because the LS is so understated but expensive to run it becomes a paradox- it is an example of inner satisfaction and contentment. Look at it this way, all the people out on the roads who drive expensive and ostentatious cars do it for a reason, they want to be noticed and they want people to covet them and quite frankly, if I had a life which was worth coveting and being jealous of then I wouldn't need to prove that. Who needs to prove what they know already? What's the aim? People in pricey to run gas guzzling cars like the LS which don't however stand out and look more plain compared to the competition display the fact that the owner has enough in the world that they are happy of themselves and feel awkward shoving it in people's faces. Perhaps it's just that your mom in law felt that a fortunate professional like yourself should be proud of his success and want to flaunt it and she is very proud of you? What your father IL said though (in my personal opinion, not trying to be offensive) is not very nice and factually wrong. Either way it's your choice and the Lexus beats all the competition. The 460 is one of my many dream cars lol and no one is shameful for wanting a car to their personal taste. Buy it and be happy, and safe!  Btw- many many years back when I was a kiddie and my mom was waiting to pick me up outside school in gold on beige 430 one of the other moms said she looked like a Russian spy so can't be all that bad 🤣 However all the LS drivers I see around UK are older people or enthusiasts, no pimps that I know of and that certainly isn't the rep they get here. In the States maybe? 

4

LPG your LS you know it makes sense.

 

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Everyone I know, friends, colleagues, parents were shocked that I changed BMW and didn't buy another BMW, well, I was quite surprised myself but I like being different and unpredictable sometimes! 🙂

One friend still calls my car a fork lift truck but I don't mind, this is just jealousy as he drives 2.0 diesel Skoda! 🙂

 

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8 minutes ago, Vlady said:

Everyone I know, friends, colleagues, parents were shocked that I changed BMW and didn't buy another BMW, well, I was quite surprised myself but I like being different and unpredictable sometimes! 🙂

One friend still calls my car a fork lift truck but I don't mind, this is just jealousy as he drives 2.0 diesel Skoda! 🙂

 

How on earth can someone see a Fork lift truck, when looking at a Mark4 GS450h ?

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On 2/19/2019 at 9:36 AM, Bob Karly said:

My father in law asked how many HP the car had. When I told 381 HP he just FREAKED OUT big, big time. Started saying that such a car is for dumb, idiot and irrational people. He did not even bother to ask me to see the pictures and videos of the car. Not even bothered to hear why I would buy such a car after researching  every day in the last 3 months to find the best, most reliable and safe car for the budget I have. His "argument" is that buying such a car to commute 70 Km a day to work is ridiculous. I was shocked.

I just read your post and I am sorry to hear the abuse you received from your father in law. He is absolutely wrong and it is YOUR CHOICE. There is nothing wrong with the car and the power it delivers. It is a great looking car indeed and it is equivalent to an S Class in this category and drives superbly. Do not back down to their demand and remember you only live once and do what you think is right for you. If you are happy with it, then great. Don't do something to please your dad in law or get his approval. You are an adult and he should respect you as an individual. Enjoy this amazing car!!!!!

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1 hour ago, royoftherovers said:

How on earth can someone see a Fork lift truck, when looking at a Mark4 GS450h ?

It is not because the way it looks but because of the electrical drive. 🙂 lol

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