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Friday Joke


NickE
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Yes, it's raining here in Northampton, and has been all day so far. Not heavy, but a constant drizzle. If you are now putting off JAE until tomorrow when the forecast is for much better weather, perhaps you need cheering up:

A major High Street bank are installing new "Drive-through" cash point machines and

customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

To enable users to use this new facility the following procedures have

been drawn up.

MALE CUSTOMERS

1 Drive up to the cash machine

2 Insert card into machine and enter PIN

3 Enter amount of cash required and withdraw

4 Retrieve card, cash and receipt

5 Drive off

FEMALE CUSTOMERS

1 Drive up to cash machine

2 Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine

3 Re-start the stalled engine

4 Wind down the window

5 Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

6 Turn the radio down

7 Attempt to insert card into machine

8 Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car

9 Insert card

10 Re-insert card the right way up

11 Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page

12 Enter PIN.

13 Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

14 Enter amount of cash required

15 Check make up in rear view mirror, adding lipstick if required

16 Retrieve card and receipt

17 Search through handbag contents on seat to locate purse and place card inside

18 Place receipt in back of cheque book

19 Re-check make-up

20 Drive forwards 2 meters

21 Reverse back to cash machine

22 Retrieve cash

23 Re-locate purse and place cash inside

24 Give appropriate hand signal to irate male drivers queuing behind

25 Restart stalled engine and pull off

26 Drive for 2 to 3 miles

27 Release hand brake

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