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Missed My Lexus In Delhi


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Guys, I've just had a month in Delhi ( opening my new back office there ) and would just absolutely NEVER EVER drive there. The road users are mad, you would need a degree in kamikaze survival techniques.

No one worries about knocks, dents and scratches, no one ever stops for those.

It's only if a bumper actually gets knocked off the car that anyone worries ................. and traffic lights, well, they seem to be simply for the pretty colours

Anyone else experienced the mayhem of those roads ?

My driver guy has a newish Hyundai i10, a tiny car with loadsa knocks and scrapes ............... no one worries, it's only a car !!!

Malc

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I have visited India a great deal, for work. over the last 10 years.

I agree, adherence to whatever rules of the road they have, does seem to be purely optional.

Experiences have included cars choosing to go down a dual carriageway on the wrong side, because it was obviously too far to go down the correct side to the next roundabout, and come back again. (the same goes to guys riding elephants - and they do this at night time, and elephants don't have lights).

A taxi driver who hit heavy traffic, and because I was in a hurry, opted to drive down the pavement to get me to my destination on time. It was like in the original Italian Job film, when the minis drove down the pavements.

Seeing a coach on the main Delhi/Chandigarh road with a man sitting on the roof with four goats, who ooked petrified as they tried to remain upright. Hooves on painted metal don't provide much grip, and the coach was doing 60mph.

The traffic lights count down the seconds to when they go green, and the cars, motorbikes, scooters, trucks and tuktuks all rev their engines and it is like the start of a F1 race as they all hurtle off. Some 'jump the start', and then have to dodge the vehicles coming left to right across them, who came through on the red light.

The sight of five people on a small motorbike, Father driving, with a young child lying over the petrol tank like a saddle bag (the father with one hand on the handle bar, the other pinning the child in place, behind the father was a second child wedged between the him and the mother, and the mother was breast feeding a third child.

The law states that the rider of a motorbike, must wear a helmet, but the same law does not apply to any number of passengers on the bike. The law is also quite loose in its definition of a motorbike helmet. I have often seen a hard hat from a building site being used, which explains why you never see hard hats on construction sites. The best helmet I have ever seen was a large plastic bucket.

On one of my earlier trips, a driver was taking me somewhere at night, but had no lights on. When I commented, he said there was no point in turning on his headlights at night, as it just wore out the bulbs.

Lastly, I was being driven along a mountain road, with some sharp corners, and large drops off the side. My driver overtook a slow moving lorry, on a blind corner, with nowhere to go if another vehicle came towards us. After shouting at him about his poor driving, I calmed down a bit, and asked him if he was afraid of dying. His reply was "if it is my day to die, it is my day to die". When I asked about me, he replied "sir, in that case it will be your day to die too".

India. You've just got to love it :whistling:

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... hey, I experienced all of that ( and more ) camels and elephants, bullock drawn carts and the wandering sacred cows on Delhi's main roads ............... and the guys coming towards you on the wrong side of the dual carriageway too ...... that's quite usual !!!

And my driver could only say " my India ". Facts as I've been told then:

Indian subcontinent represents one fifth of the world population

Indians themselves represent 50% of worldwide population

Prime Minister Modi they tell me is a cause for good and more has been achieved ( is being achieved ) during his time in Office than at any other time ............. and his election Programme and outcome came about essentially from his Facebook campaign ......... one of the guys on my Delhi Team was a part of that Facebook campaign ................ bring on the social Media concept for effective marketing eh ! :outforcount:

Malc

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My strongest memory of India from my recent first visit is how many smiles you see from people who have no material wealth whatsoever.

But seeing the first truck coming towards us on our side of the dual carriageway is definitely up there too!

Jon

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I spent some time in Nigeria, a great place to suggest to your mother in law she should take a peaceful holiday. Joke only. The driving there is among the most dangerous I have ever encountered any where in the world. The most dangerous road is called the Western Avenue in Lagos and it has several million people living on both sides of the road together with living down the central reservation and every walk way over the road. to add to that you drive which ever side of the dual carriage way you wont. I saw many people hit by vehicles of all sizes and none of them stopped that's if the road was moving because most days it used to come to a standstill and you just hoped you could get out of it and back to your hotel as you did not want to be out on the roads at night. Thank god for retirement. Mike.

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Between 1990 and 2005, I visited India at least twice a month. If I had the required literary skill, I could probably write a book on the place. Malc and Jon have made two very valid points in; NEVER, EVER, drive in India and the fact that, although desperately poor, they are very friendly.

I'll just pick two of the many driving stories I have:

I wanted a car to travel 30 miles the next day, so I arranged a car AND driver at the desk in the hotel. I insisted that it had air-conditioning. 'Not a problem, Sahib'.

Next morning, there was an Austin Ambassador-based taxi with 'Air Conditioned' on the side. When I climbed in beside the smiling driver, I noticed the heat was stifling. This was the conversation......

Me: 'Can you turn on the air conditioning please?'

Driver: 'Sahib, it is not working'.

Me: 'I asked for a car with air conditioning'.

Driver: 'Sahib, it HAS got air conditioning - but it is not working'..............

On another occasion two of us wanted to visit an old fort about 40 miles from Delhi.......again in an Austin Ambassador taxi. We were soon in the middle of nowhere with not a soul in sight. The car coughed and steam belched from under the bonnet. We got out, the driver lifted the bonnet and it was obvious that the head gasket had blown. Our quizzical looks were met with 'Not a problem, Sahib'.

The driver went to the boot and took out a bucket with minimal tools in it. He then undid the head bolts and lifted off the head. In the meantime, as if by magic, a crowd had gathered - I have no idea where they came from.

We then noticed that the 'head gasket' was, in fact a piece of cardboard with 'Carnation Milk' still visible.......there was a split in it - the leak. He gave the bucket to a young boy with instructions to go and get some water. In the meantime, he went to the boot and re-appeared with another piece of 'Carnation Milk' cardboard, then using a knife and with the old gasket as a template, proceeded to 'manufacture' a new gasket.

He dropped it in position then replaced the head. The head-bolt tightening sequence was instructive......starting at the front, he hand tightened the first nut - then torqued it using a 3ft long bar. He carried on till all nuts were fitted - this is the head tightening sequence in India :)

The young lad had returned with, what looked like, a bucket of diluted mud.....this went in the radiator. Off we went to enjoy the old fort. We made it back to Delhi with no more technical problems.

Happy days!

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Maddest I have ever seen was in Istanbul, but these stories make it sound like a quiet Sunday in Bakewell.

For crazy un-expected I did find Jo'burg and Cape Town interesting, goats on the motorway, and pedestrians without a care, and at night driving through red lights (or robots as they call them), because you might get car-jacked if you stop. So you had to keep your wits about you all the time even when it appeared to be safe.

Also the A22 in Algarve used to be really 'interesting', lots of high speed drink driving which is why it earned it's reputation as one of Europe's worst roads, saw lots of near death maneuvers back 20 years ago, though not so bad since they built the dual carriageway down to Lagos.

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Caracas, Venezuela is also interesting to drive in and is spiced up by the knowledge you are in the murder capital of the world.

Everyone pushes in, and no one thanks you when you let them go ahead. It is interesting because despite the fiery latin temperament in 33deg C and pollution to peel the paint there is no road rage.

Those in a hurry carve up the others while the rest calmly sit out the endless traffic chaos.

The traffic police earn their Christmas bonus by pulling you over for an on the spot fine for any imaginary violation.

My friend was driving down a country lane with the end of week wages on board for his workers when a car came alongside and he found himself looking down the barrel of a '44.

Turned out to be the local police chief.

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